chickinandbread's posterous

soup of my soul

full of it

i think people who just write their initial(s) as the signature line of any correspondence are so full of themselves. 

"Please note that the attached documents are confidential. Don't hesitate to contact me if you have questions. -M"

really...are you really the only "M" in this world? Well, hello! my name happens to also start with the letter "M." Oh, and it's worst when the name is a single syllabic name or a three letter name and the person chooses to still abbreviate.  

UGH.  

A Year in Review...

Sent from my iPhone

In 2009
1. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Study for the LSATs, get my wisdom teeth extracted, live alone/get my own studio, hot air balloon ride, complete a 5k, experience the night light in Manila, and really explore what the OC has to offer…oh and soon, spend the NYE in NYC!

2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I did keep some of them or I suppose, I partially accomplished some of them. Yes, I will make or set goals (I don’t want to call it “resolutions”- sounds heavy!)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No.

5. What countries did you visit?
Philippines and Korea!

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
Patience for people who truly care for me.

7. What date(s) from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 26th, February 4th, March 11th, and April 6th

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I can’t think of anything that I am particularly proud of/grand. Maybe when an employee who works for my company commended my work, wrote to my managers/directors, and claimed that I am the best worker he’s ever met as he listed the names of the companies were he previously worked. Oh...doing the 5k. That was fulfilling.  

9. What was your biggest failure?
Relationships, in general with people. Keeping them…sustaining them, maintaining them.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
An awful pulmonary viral infection in the Summer that kept me home for the whole week! Boo.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
An updated wardrobe?

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
I am trying to make this as personal as possible but can’t think of a personal one for this question. I’d say the guy who jumped the terrorist on the plane (attempted Christmas day terrorist attack).

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Myself, at times. Some of the times, my boss.

14. Where did most of your money go?
I’d say my Invisalign and all that pre-dental work before I got the Invisalign.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Getting/moving into my own studio! The prospect of owning a pet/dog.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
We Run LA by Ya Boy and Blame It, for sure. I feel like whenever I hear this song, I feel good So Cal memories/ feel like I actually like So Cal. A couple of others make the mark: Kiss me thru the phone, Boom Boom Boom, Watcha Say by Derulo, Best I Ever Had by Drake, Knock You Down, I Hate This Part by PCD and other overly played ones like Gaga’s songs and Obsessed by Mariah Carey. 

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
Wiser? Yes
Healthier? First half of the year, Yes. Second half, womp wommp.
Richer? About the same. How sad!

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Go to the gym. Pray. Go to church. Track budget more consistently. Cook more at home.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Freaking out about the LSATs.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
I don’t get this question…I just finished Christmas.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
30Rock.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
No…maybe really dislike, yes.

25. What was the best book you read?
Atlas Logic Games book.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Drake, NeYo, The Dream, and Lil Wayne is one great rapper.  And Youtube kids like Erika David, Kat Badar, Rin on da Rox, jr Aquino, Gabe Bondoc, AJ Rafael, An Le, Randolph Permejo, Carlo Anton, and others.

27. What did you want and get?
Wanted peace of mind and contentment. Not quite sure if I fully/consistently have these yet.

28. What did you want and not get?
HA! A pay raise, salary increase, a new job! Oh and running the 5k under 25 mins. I'm working towards that still. 

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Taken.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 24 this year. On my actual birthday, I met a friend for brunch in Downtown Laguna Beach. When I got home, I took a nap, did laundry, and then went to get an hour massage. After the massage, my parents came over and we had dinner at a really nice all-you-can-eat Korean BBQ place.

31. What's one thing that would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If the economy wasn’t so horrible…things would be better off for me and a lot of people.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
A mild case of hipster-ness meets express (work). As often as I could, I wore my classic gray hoody (from Abe), black jeans, and flip flops.  

33. What kept you sane?
Having a goal, working towards a goal, and the potential benefits of accomplishing my goals. Old friends that I can always count on/call.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
None.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Health Care reform.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

Procrastination is the most visible reflection of self-doubts and insecurities.
Love and live freely.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
I just want you close ‘cuz you make me smile. I just cannot get you off my mind. With each kiss, you blow me away, and without you, I think I’d go crazy. For your love, I’d do anything ‘cuz to me, you are my everything. (It’s a beautiful song by Randolph Permejo of youtube.com).  

Inspired by the gratitude journal iPhone app

And I'm not going to pay for that application. Why pay when I can write my thoughts here. I am going to try to make this a daily ritual. 5 things. Daily. So it begins...

Today I am grateful for...
1. Discovering the toffee frostee twist from wendy's...it is heavenly
2. For a great football game...and winning the game against the true rival team
3. A 20 dollar reflexology, 1 hour massage
4. Great newly found Vietnamese food place
5. Trip to Petco and envisioning/planning for a bigger fish tank for my babies :)

5 simple things make life beautiful.

Sent from my iPhone

the grass is always greener

sometimes, i find it very hard to look at some of my friends' facebook page. i feel like everyone's having such a fun post-college life while i, on the other hand, lead quite a mundane one. i mean, i know that, of course, people post and talk about the good and never really the mundane (otherwise, what's the point, right?), but at times, it's hard to feel left out and that i've missed the bus. 

it's weird and it's a bit hard to explain. i feel like i've prematurely accelerated my life/my aging. it's like i live the lifestyle of someone who's 32, single, and working. i feel independent and often, too independent, for my own liking and good. this weekend, i saw two movies which both highlighted strong and independent, yet lonely, characters. and thought to myself - i hope that i don't turn 30 and become like that. god forbid, i hope i am not like that now. 

i do make some efforts to show that i can control my life and enhance what's here and now. some days, i do a better job than others but when those other days are around, they could be hard to deal with. i am optimistic, though, that this is just part of being 20-something and things will get better once i'm pursuing something that's in line with my interests, once i'm more financially stable, and once i am where i want to be.  

on everything else - work (warning: obscene language)

i realized that my entry from yesterday didn't really capture the "everything else" piece of my life for i mainly wrote about the lsat and a line on paranormal activity. haha i'd like to think that there's more to my life than studying for an entrance exam and liking a horror flick. oh, you know, like a bad job and a horrid manager. with this in mind, let me try to give you a little preview on what else's been up -

work has been, what katie perry would describe as 'hot and cold.' i'm understanding now what i dislike about my job: it's the realization that i cannot trust my manager. she's a tattle tale. need i say more? she's the kind of person who'd twist your little, innocent comments to something grander that it becomes a work problem. it's unfortunate that, sometimes, her managerial style and social approach are worse than those of someone who was home schooled (no offense, just being stereotypical, but i'm upset so please give me a break). maybe she's just sheltered. maybe simply she needs to get fucked by a big black weiner to make her feel liked and wanted. or perhaps, she needs to shed some weight. whatever causes her managerial and social deficiencies...she's done enough bad (more than good) that's lead me to not trust her. ever. 

not to run away from trouble but monster.com, here i come. 

[i'll do bits and pieces of "on everything else" here and there (on different topics) so that my thoughts don't drive me too crazy)

update on life and everything else

things have been fine on my end (for all you 2 people who read my blog). as usual, i am still studying for the lsats and will finally take the exam next month. am i ready for it? honestly, no, i am not because i am still scoring in a pretty wide range. this lack of consistency lowers my confidence...especially that i have just a month left before the exam. but i am not going to postpone my exam date like i've done (twice) before. i am going to give my best preparation before the exam next month and walk in the test room with as much confidence as i possible. if i don't feel good about my performance after the test, i'll cancel - simple solution :) then sign up for the february test and feel good that i'm picking up my studying at a good spot or point. no worries :)

honestly, i dont' know what's going to be the purpose of my existence after i am done with the lsats. part of me has really learned to like the process of studying and deconstructing the exam so that i could answer each problems correctly. as far as applications go, i might have to postpone my plans to apply this year and send in my apps next cyle (to start in Fall 2011). i'm a bit bummed that i have to wait this long to execute my plans but i'm trying to acknowledge (as much as i can) the pros of the situation - 

1.) more time to prepare my application and send in my application much earlier than i could this year. because admissions are on a rolling basis, there are some advantages to sending the applications early. it's too bad though, i have five fee waivers for this cycle (and some really great schools!); 2.) work more and save more...maybe i can lower my credit card debt significantly and be in a much better shape (financially) before i commit to more student loans; 3.) find a new job..something that pays more or something that's more fulfilling; 4.) do something more fun ...travel, volunteer abroad, study Spanish in Spain...something to give more or add a sense of vibrancy to my boring, mundane, repetitive corporate-bitch life; 5.) if i sustain my desire to go to law school by next year, i am that much more sure and committed to this plan. 

in conclusion (hahaha my professors writing my letters of rec will hate me for the "in conclusion"), more time is good! it ain't bad! it's only bad when i make it out to be..but i gotta admit, it's hard to put things or plans on hold for another year. it's cool though (re-reads all the reasons above). 

on another note, watch paranormal activity. it's the greatest horror movie, ever. that film maker's for sure imaginative.